Monday, January 11, 2010

Marriage

I picked up Elizabeth Gilbert’s newest book “Committed: A Skeptic Makes Peace with Marriage” today. I was a big fan of her “Eat, Pray, Love” and I happened to read it at the end of a nine year relationship that I had not anticipated the end of. I got to go on a healing journey through a book and I do believe it helped me. I am not a big fan of so called self help books and I truly do not believe that is what Gilbert wrote. I think she simply wrote her story and people related to it and found solace and familiarity in her words. I have also read another one of her books, “The Last American Man”, this work was what she was more known for before “Eat, Pray, Love” she wrote about men and maleness. “The Last American Man” is about Eustace Conway and his struggle to live with and off the land as early American Indians did. He wanted to help pass on this knowledge to others. He also struggled with doing this in a modern society and proving himself as worthy to his father. It was a great book. Gilbert became good friends with Eustace and you got a very good idea of his life and the struggle that seemed ever present in his mind.


Gilbert’s latest book picks up where her last left off, in love with a man and happy. From the reviews and previews the book covers Gilbert coming to terms with marriage. In order for the man that she loves to stay in the states they must get married (he has Australian citizenship I believe) and Gilbert is willing to do this but it sounds like it is not something she is looking forward to.

Before I have even started the book it has made me think about my past, current, and future relationships. I mentioned that I was once in a relationship that lasted nine years. We lived together for nine years, never breaking up and never getting married. For a long time I really had no interest in getting married, I didn’t feel that we needed to; I also thought we would last. Do I think that if we had gotten married that we would have lasted? No. I think it would have ended much the same. I have now been living with another man for over a year, we dated a year before I moved in, unlike my last long term relationship where we knew each other for two days and then he moved in. I now want to get married. I am not sitting around tapping my toe wondering every minute when he will propose, but I want one day to get married to this man and have a family. I believe he is the man who I am supposed to have a family with and raise children. I don’t have an exact outline of how this will all occur but I see a big picture which for me is ok for now.

1 comment:

  1. I lived with D before we married, that's my disclaimer before I say this: "married" means there is more to risk, more at stake, more reason to work things out. I'm glad to read that you feel so positively this time around!

    ReplyDelete